19 Days to Go!

I'll admit it, I've been a bad blogger.

Bad! Bad Blogger! *slaps own wrist*

I've honestly just been so out of it lately, that I haven't had much (anything coherent anyway) to say. I'm sore, I'm tired, and, well... after I post this I'll be going for a nap.

I've been thinking a lot about our pregnancy now that it's almost over. There are things I've really enjoyed about being pregnant (feeling little E move, watching my alien trying to bust out, etc.), and a lot of things I won't miss in the least (hemorrhoids, nausea, pelvic pain, contractions, waddling, etc.). Women really must have selective memories, or I can't imagine why anyone would put in a repeat performance. ;)

The renovations here are so far behind that I prefer not to think about them. We got the front room done. I really do love having all my small animals (turtles, parrot, rats, chinchilla) in the same room. It's nice to be able to sit there and visit with all of them. It's the only room we've finished, so I'm spending quite a bit of time in there. Helps me stress less about the rest of the house.

We've bought all of the larger ticket items we'll need for E's arrival now. Car seat, stroller, crib, and bassinet (it's really cool, if you want to look it up on the net, it's the Simplicity 4-in-1 Convertible... yeah, it's not the co-sleeper I wanted, but Damon wasn't comfortable ordering something so expensive online, so I needed to find something that would work by our bedside locally, and this was what I found). Lots of little things still needed - like the ergo carrier, a diaper pail, a diaper bag, a wet bag (for in the diaper bag), etc. We'll get there eventually though. At least we have enough that if I go in early (which my doctor says is a possibility) the baby can get home (car seat) and have a place to sleep (bassinet). The rest will come. :)

Damon and I finally nailed down our name choices. He'd decided he really didn't want Alora or Edward, so we scratched them (despite my LOVING Alora). After some back and forth, he admitted that he wasn't cool with the idea of two middle names (another thing I love, figure we should give our child as many choices as possible should they decide they don't like their name)... so I let go of that too. What we ended up with were really his choices, but I'm totally cool with them as I liked everything we'd narrowed it down to. Soooo.... We're expecting either

Lily-Ann Marie Smith
or
Sidney Jackson Smith


After my little sister, Marie, and Damon's Papa, Sidney.

Anyway, now that we've caught up a bit. ;) I'm going to head on downstairs, cuddle with my kidlets (dogs), and attempt to get comfortable enough for a short snooze.

Until I post another update, take care.

Baby Name Help - Your Chance to Weigh in.

Well, We've made it to 33 weeks and 3 days. 46 days until our due date, 25 days until we are considered full term. I think it's time to start nailing down all the details about E's name.

We've known from the beginning that it will be Jack or Lily... and that Lily will actually be Lily-Anne or Lily-Ann. But that's about where it stops. Middle names we're considering for Lily - Mae, Sydney, Marie, Alora... so she could be Lily-Ann Alora Marie Smith, Lily-Anne Sydney Mae Smith, Lily-Anne Marie Smith, etc. etc.

Mae was Damon's Grandmas middle name (Ila Mae), and I adored her. She was the first person to truly welcome me into the family years and years ago. She and I used to spend many of our days together. When Damon left for work, he'd drop me off at Ilas, and the two of us would just visit all day. I really do miss her.

Sidney was Damon's Papa (paternal grandpa)... and everyone who knew him loved him. He was just Papa - to everyone. He was always so full of love. He will always be missed and well remembered.

Marie is my little sister, and she is beyond special to both Damon and I. She's just... well... Marie. Words could never capture her, not truly. To try would only do her an injustice.

Alora is just something I really like.

So, what are your thoughts on a full name for Lily?

Now with Jack, we have even less decided... Jack could be Jacky, Giaccamo, Jackson or any variation on that theme. Middle (or first) names could be William, Sydney, Darius, Edward, or something else entirely. Soooo... Jack could be William Jackson Smith, Giaccamo Sydney Edward Smith, Sydney Jacky Smith, Darius Jackson Smith, etc.

William is a family name... my dad, my brother, and my grampa are all Williams. I think it's a beautiful traditional name. But we'd need to be careful to stay away from anything that would bring up Will Smith or Billy Jack.

Sidney is mentioned above (with Lily's explanations).

Darius is just a nice D name... and I kinda like the idea of Jack being a D.J. because that's what Damon is (Damon Jason).

Edward is a name I've always liked.

So... what are your thoughts on a name for Jack?

Please do weigh in. We don't have all that much longer to have something picked out... and obviously we're in need of some help in this department!!!

Second (and last) Ultrasound

We had our second (and final) ultrasound yesterday morning. E has moved into the proper head down position, and all of the internal organs are looking good. Unfortunately we still weren't able to get a "for sure" on the sex... E had a foot up right in front of the genitals... So E will remain E until E is born. LOL

The not-so-thrilling-for-mommy news?

E is HUGE!!!

That's right. Huge.

Babies at this stage are normally about four pounds (some just under, some just over). E is five and a half pounds!!!! I'm real glad E is healthy and strong... but that's just plain scary! Definitely NOT looking forward to pushing THAT out. Damon, of course, couldn't stop grinning. Boy needs to be slapped. LMAO

Will I Love E?

This may sound like an absurd worry to some... but it's a worry for me none the less. So many soon-to-be moms that I've visited with are already in love with their little one, before they even arrive. Personally, I have no such feelings.

Logically I'm quite aware that it's a baby growing inside my ever expanding midriff, but honestly? It's still a completely abstract concept. I think it's neat, I think it's exciting. I love watching my belly move about as if it's got a life of it's own. Despite all this, there is no feeling of love, or even of connection at this point. Should I not, at the VERY least, feel connected to the life inside of me? Feel some sort of bond? There is nothing. No link or tie. No attachment.

I know others will insist that it will come. I WILL have all these feelings and more... but how can anyone be certain, when I myself, am not? Will I love E when E arrives, or will there continue to be a disconnect there? E is neat, E is exciting, E is interesting... but E is not loved and treasured. That's not a good thought.

The closer we get to our due date, the more of a disconnect I feel. I realize it's probably a stress reaction, but I really am feeling less and less of a bond as the clock continues to bring us closer to E's arrival. Everyone around me can't wait for E to get here, and here I am wishing I was back in the second trimester with more time.

I don't have enough time.

More Chinese Zodiac...

This site has excellent zodiac information... much more detailed, and too long to post directly into my blog. So, if you'd like a little more insight into the Snake, Horse, and Pig (or your own Chinese Zodiac sign) I highly recommend checking this one out.

S N A K E - H O R S E - P I G

Links to each of the other nine signs are located at the bottom, and top, of the above pages.