Thursday, April 19, 2007

It's Like That Scene in Alien...

For the last few days Damon and I have been watching a rather strange phenomenon. Little "E" is so large now, that E's starting to poke right out of my bulbous belly.

I first discovered this strange turn when I was reclining in bed reading a magazine. Everything was going along as usual when the magazine, which was propped up on my belly (which is now conveniently at reading height) suddenly and mysteriously pitched one way then another before resting again at it's original height. I lifted the magazine and peeked down at my watermelon sized self.

It took me a second to process what had actually occurred. Truly unsure that anything had happened at all... I cautiously placed the magazine back down on my spheric middle third and returned to the article I'd been perusing.

Back into the story having all but forgotten the event of moments ago, the magazine again teetered. Lolling from one side of my rotund frame to the other. There was no putting this out of mind. It had indeed happened. This wasn't some delusion of pregnancy brought on by hormones and lack of sleep.

Closing the magazine I placed it cover down beside me on the bed. I pulled down the blankets, lifted my shirt revealing my fetal induced corpulence, and placed one hand on either side of my bulge. Where I quietly waited.

Sure enough, within moments, my belly rolled... like the rolling of the ocean tide. Undulating across the sea of my girth. As E moved, so to did the tissue covering and protecting him/her. I'm sure I cracked the biggest grin of my life. I was completely astonished!

(about this time, Damon got home from work)

I watched the drama playing out on/in my belly for several minutes in absolute amazement. When E chose not to turn or roll, but to begin kicking. Now, instead of calm billows, there were forceful thrusts attempting to blast their way out of the smooth surface of my midriff. This immediately brought to mind the scene in Alien where the unearthly infant cuts it's way through the crew members midriff. I couldn't contain my laughter - and not being one to emit a polite, petite, girly giggle - I blurted out an enormous belly laugh... causing some rather raucous stomach movements of my own. I'm sure this is where the producer MUST have drawn inspiration from for that scene.

In any case... it's now become a common event to find Damon or I staring at my nekkid midriff patiently waiting for the next performance or curtain call. After all; "Life is but a stage"... or at least a science fiction movie. ;)

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